Qualified or not . . .

"God doesn't chose people who are qualified. He calls people who are willing, and then He qualifies them".  - Richard Parker 

Raising Boys

I came across this article that gives us moms some good advice on what a mom should try to be to her kids.  I'm not sure who wrote this - but it is good "mom" advice for all of us moms! 

1.  A safe place to figure themselves out.
It happens almost every day, and sometimes many times a day:  Teenagers are always changing.  They will change their clothes.  Their mood.  How they walk, talk or what they’re into.  Some days they just need to figure out what feels right.  Some days nothing feels right.  Being a teenager is hard.  Sometimes our greatest job as Mom is to act like we don’t even notice.

2.  Boundaries.
Our boys need to know what is absolutely ok, and what is absolutely not.  They may resist rules, but deep down they feel safe when there are clear cut rules without exceptions.  Make them clear and consistent, and have absolute consequences in place for when they break rules.  Boundaries = Security. 

3.  Freedom.
Within those boundaries, teenage boys need the opportunity to stretch their wings.  Teenage boys should be encouraged…Even pushed–to try new things, to take some risks, to find adventure.  Given enough opportunities for healthy adventure, they will avoid a lot of trouble.  (Remember–”Idle hands” and all of that…)
Keep boys busy doing character building, exciting activities and watch them become men before your eyes.
Side note: **My personal Mom-motto has always been “With Freedom comes responsibility.”  The minute my boys act in irresponsibly, they will lose freedom.  So the freedoms we give are taken very seriously.  

4.  A Listening Ear.Boys need to talk.  Even the quietest ones will open up when given the chance.  Get them alone, in the car or wherever you can, and make it clear that you WANT to hear about their interests, and their lives.  Be patient, and try different times and places until you figure it out.  I push through the ‘awkward,’ and bring up subjects that make my boys squirm (hello puberty!) but no one has died yet.  This makes it clear that I am OK with any and every topic and I will always be available and comfortable talking.
**When asked what he most needs from me, this was the first thing my oldest son named.  A Mom that can listen and not criticize or manipulate is a really valuable thing. (call me a work in progress here.)

5.  A Sense of Humor.
This is the good stuff.  Teenagers…are hilarious.  This may be my very favorite thing about these years.  No more knock-knock jokes or bad made-up jokes that never seem to come to a conclusion.  Teenagers actually GET STUFF.   There’s hardly anything like the bond of a good laugh with my boys.

When one of my boys come out laughing and want me to watch a funny Vine or Youtube Video, I drop everything for it.
Side note #1: As for us–**We have a rule of “clean” entertainment only.  No swearing or off color anything.  And they know that if I find them following anyone inappropriate, I’ll remove their Vine/YouTube etc account(See #2))
Side note #2**I have a “I can check your phone, computer, etc anytime I want to–no questions asked.”  This keeps everyone in check.

There is plenty of FUN and FUNNY entertainment out there if you look for it.
it’s a hard world:  A good sense of humor will get your kid through many trials in life–So encourage it.

6.  Touch.
Your teenage son will likely pull away from you physically, and that is normal, albeit painful.  But even the most rigid, sulky teenage boy needs hugs from Mom.  Don’t get awkward and keep a distance.  Create a “hug a day” rule or something that makes it routine and normal.  He’ll love it even if he refuses to show it.

7.  Genuine interest.
What does your teenager love?  Learn to love it too.  Know at least enough about what they are passionate about so that you can have a decent conversation.   This will keep doors open greater than any other gesture you can make.

8.  Forgiveness.
Teenagers will make mistakes.  Lots of them.  They’ll act selfish.  They’ll space out.  They’ll get insecure and do stupid things because of it.  They are going to mess up so much you’ll wonder where you went wrong.  If you know it’s coming, it won’t throw you off.  Consequences may be in order, but so is a whole lot of grace.

9.  Direction.
Listen Mom:  Your teenager actually WANTS you to give them guidance.  Sure, they’ll act like they don’t, but they do.  Keep it relevant, and as brief as possible, but when you see them facing forks in the road, go ahead and speak some good solid words of advice to them.  Share a Bible Verse that fits their situation.  Quote someone they might respect.  You are their greatest resource they have, and they need your direction.  They’ll thank you, even if it takes twenty years.

10.  Encouragement.
It’s hard to be a teenager.  (remember?)  The world will yell and scream all kinds of negatives to your son.  So be his greatest fan.  Be his cheerleader.  Believe in him with your heart, and tell him that you do.  Every.  Single.  Day.  I’m not talking about phony, contrived encouragement (Everyone is a winner!) but the authentic kind that finds their greatest gifting's, and speaks them boldly.

11.  An example.
Our kids are watching us.  They get a lot more of an idea about what is right, wrong, good and bad from what you do than what you say.  So take your position seriously.  No, you’ll never be perfect, and you can tell your kid that–but don’t use that fact as an excuse to be lame.  If you don’t want them to swear, don’t swear.  If you teach them to speak well of others, make sure you do the same.  Probably the greatest thing you can do for your son is to model the kind of person you want them to be.

A common key to pretty much everything I have named is that Mom is involved in the teen’s life.  To listen, or discipline..to share a joke, or a hug…you need to be in close proximity to your kids.  For those moms that work long hours or cannot be physically involved in your children’s lives, I encourage you to creatively find solutions for this.  You will never regret making sacrifices or adjustments so that you can be present for your children when they need you.   And the thing with parenting is–you’re never really sure when they’ll need you.  So being there as much as possible is key.  Do what you are able, rely on others to help when you’re not able, and put your job as parent before anything that you possibly can. 

Finally:  If you’re like me, you’ll love parenting your teenage son.  However at times it can feel like a crazy balancing act…Do they need more grace?  More rules?  Do they need space, or hugs, or advice, or WHAT!!!???  It’s ok.  Pray a lot.  Keep communication open and let your kid know that Frankly You don’t know what they need…But you want to be there for them.  If you have invested in the early years, then the doors will be open and they will trust and respect you as teenagers too.

Advice from an Old Farmer

Shared photo by Ty Brown
The following is a bit of advice that would do us all good to read and take to heart.  Some's a bit humorous, some's just common sense - but all is worth taking time to read it for what it's worth!!

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.
Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.
Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere
     tractor.
Words that soak into your ears are whispered… not yelled.
Meanness don’t jes’ happen overnight.
Forgive your enemies; it messes up their heads.
Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
It don’t take a very big person to carry a grudge.
You cannot unsay a cruel word.
Every path has a few puddles.
When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
The best sermons are lived, not preached.
Most of the stuff people worry about ain’t never gonna
     happen anyway.
Don’t judge folks by their relatives.
Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
Live a good, honorable life… Then when you get older and
     think back, you’ll enjoy it a second time.
Don ‘t interfere with somethin’ that ain’t bothering you
     none.
Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a Rain dance.
If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop
     diggin’.
Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
The biggest troublemaker you’ll probably ever have to deal
     with, watches you from the mirror every mornin’.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that
     comes from bad judgment.
Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin’
     it back in.
If you get to thinkin’ you’re a person of some influence, try
     orderin’ somebody else’s dog around.
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
Don’t pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight,
     he’ll just kill you.
Most times, it just gets down to common sense.

Gracious Words

Years ago growing up on the farm, one of my fondest memories was the year we robbed the "honeycomb" out of the big tree down in the pasture!!  I will never forget that moment.  My Aunt Jinny and Uncle Howard were out visiting. They came out to the farm almost "weekly" and Aunt Jinny was "game" for almost anything.  She is the same aunt that we made divinity in every color of the rainbow - now just the traditional pink, white or green - every color . . . just to see if it tasted any different!!  LOL!

My brother came up to the house from checking on the cows in the pasture and said, "there's a big "honeycomb" in a tree down in the pasture"!  That is all it took for Aunt Jinny to perk up and say, "let's go rob it"!!!   And so we all - the whole family - tracked down the well-worn cow path up and down and around and over until we saw the bees swarming around the tree.  It brought back memories of Pooh Bear!!!  LOL!

We all kept our distance watching as Aunt Ginny and my brother, John, slowly approached the bee hive.  Moving slowly, so as to not upset the bees, they got the honeycomb down out of the tree, put it in a 5 gallon bucket, and managed to get only a sting or two. Leaving the confused, angry, buzzing bees behind, we trailed single file back up the old cow path to the barn and on to the house.

Aunt Jinny knew just what to do with the honey.  I remember it was the clearest, most tasty honey I had ever experienced. We decided that fresh, clear honey needed to top off some pancakes.  So mom was busy making hot pancakes and Aunt Jinny was taking care of getting the honey out of the comb and we kids anxiously awaited our feast of hot pancakes with fresh honey on them.  Mmmmmm . . . was that ever good!

I will NEVER forget that afternoon of robbing the honeycomb out of the tree in the pasture and pancakes dripping with the "best honey" I have ever eaten!!  

Just as that honey was the sweetest honey I have ever tasted - straight from the honeycomb - I realize how important our words are.  They too need to be pleasant, sweet, healing, uplifting, and encouraging.  Our words can have a positive influence on the world around us.  Let's strive to make our words . . . sweet to the soul and healing to the bones . . . just like that honey dripping from the honeycomb!

"Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones."  Probverbs 16:24

Eight Qualities of a Successful Life

Qualities of Success

We all want to be successful deep down in our "heart of hearts" - but how do we accomplish this task?  Here are some things Suze Orman has observed as she talks to people.  She states 
. . .  It's about making the most of the life you have.  And that comes down to embracing the eight qualities that allow you to take control of your destiny. 

• Harmony is when there is complete agreement between what you think, say and do.
  
• Balance is the reward of harmony; it is when you are most calm and content because there is no disconnect between your thoughts, words and actions.
  
• Courage. Is the ability to make choices that bring harmony and balance. Courage is not always about action. It takes courage to do nothing, rather than do something that you do not believe in or understand.
  
• Generosity. True generosity is an offering; given freely and out of pure love. No strings attached. No expectations. Time and love are the most valuable possession you can share.
  
• Happiness: bubbles up when the first four qualities are in abundance. Happiness is not a luxury. It is a necessity. When we are happy we are in the best possible place to be good to ourselves and those we love.
  
• Wisdom: is the ability to make the right decisions at the right time. Wisdom alerts you when you are out of balance or having trouble summoning courage. It is your inner voice guiding you through and past the noise.
  
• Cleanliness: When there is clarity and organization in your thoughts and your physical space you can more easily access the inner wisdom and courage that makes harmony and balance achievable.
  
• Beauty is what you possess when you incorporate the seven preceding qualities into your life.

Suse shares some pretty basic qualities:  harmony, balance, courage, generosity, happiness, wisdom, cleanliness, and beauty. But look at how they impact each of our lives as we follow God's leading and direction.  These qualities plus God equals AWESOME!!!! 

Would it Matter?

Would it Matter? Posted: 12 Nov 2014 05:43 PM PST To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived, this is to have succeeded. – Ralph Waldo Emerson If you have ever doubted yourself or believed you aren’t enough, this is for you. If you have ever lost hope, this is for you. If you have ever thought you couldn’t last one day longer, this is for you. If you have ever prayed this prayer, this is for you. The prayer What if I didn’t wake tomorrow, would anybody miss me? What if I kept my words to myself, would anybody care? Would it matter if I wasn’t here? Sometimes the world feels so large and I feel so small. The dreams that once kept me awake now haunt me because some may never come true. Why does it seem like everyone is better than me? Why does it seem like I will never get it right? What if I didn’t wake tomorrow, would anybody miss me? Would it matter? The answer Yes, it would matter. Everything you do has a ripple effect that touches the people around you. Even in your darkest hour, your presence has the ability to offer hope. It could be the smile you offer or an act of kindness you do, but understand this – you matter. You matter because you’ve been given gifts no one else has. You matter because you were created with God’s love. You matter because you were made to remind others how to be strong, be faithful and never give up. So, don’t you give up now. Because you matter. by Alex Blackwell www.The BridgeMaker.com

The Last Time

As time goes by, I look back on the many, many "last times" I have experienced.  Far too many to even put into words - some even forgotten!  Not on purpose but buried deep in my heart and mind waiting for something to jar that "last time" memory to the surface and make me smile.  The events of life may be "last time" events but we can cherish the memory of each of those "last time" memories . . . oh, the sweet fragrance of those memories!

Balloons Belong in Church ~ by Ann Weems

Here's an interesting read . . .

I took to church one morning a happy four-year-old boy

Holding a bright blue string to which was attached 

his much loved orange balloon with pink stripes...

Certainly a thing of beauty

And if not forever, at least a joy for a very important now.

When later he met me at the door

Clutching blue string, orange and pink bobbing behind him,

He didn't have to tell me something had gone wrong.

"What's the matter?" He wouldn't tell me.

"I bet they loved your balloon..."

Out it came, then -- mocking the teacher's voice, "We don't bring
balloons to church."

Then that little four-year old, his lip a little trembly, asked:

"Why aren't balloons allowed in church? I thought God would
like balloons."

I celebrate balloons, parades and chocolate chip cookies.

I celebrate seashells and elephants and lions that roar.

I celebrate roasted marshmallows and chocolate cake and fresh fish.

I celebrate aromas: bread baking, mincemeat, lemons...

I celebrate seeing: bright colors, wheat in a field, tiny wild flowers...

I celebrate hearing: waves pounding, the rain's rhythm, soft voices...

I celebrate touching: toes in the sand, a kitten's soft fur,
another person...

I celebrate the sun that shines slab dab in our faces...

I celebrate the crashing thunder and the brazen lightning...

And I celebrate the green of the world...the life-giving green...the
hope-giving green...

I celebrate birth: the wonder...the miracle...of that tiny life
already asserting its self-hood.

I celebrate children

who laugh out loud

who walk in the mud and dawdle in the puddles

who put chocolate fingers anywhere

who like to be tickled

who scribble in church

who whisperin loud voices

who sing in louder voices

who run...and laugh when they fall

who cry at the top of their lungs

who cover themselves with bandaids

who squeeze the toothpaste all over the bathroom

who slurp their soup

who chew coughdrops

who ask questions

who give us sticky, paste-covered creations

who want their picture taken

who won't use their napkins

who bury goldfish, sleep with the dog, scream at their
best friend

who hug us in a hurry and rush outside without their hats.

I celebrate children

who are so busy living they don't have time for our hangups

And I celebrate adults who are as little children.

I celebrate the man who breaks up the meaningless routines
of his life.

The man who stops to reflect, to question, to doubt.

-- The man who isn't afraid to feel....

The man who refuses to play the game.

I celebrate anger at injustice

I celebrate tears for the mistreated, the hurt, the lonely...

I celebrate the community that cares... the church...

I celebrate the church.

I celebrate the times when we in the church made it...

When we answered a cry

When we held to our warm and well-fed bodies a lonely world.

I celebrate the times when we let God get through to our
hiding places

Through our maze of meetings

Our pleasant facade...deep down to our selfhood

Deep down to where we really are.

Call it heart, soul, naked self

It's where we hide

Deep down away from God

And away from each other.

I celebrate the times when the church is the Church

When we are Christians

When we are living, loving, contributing God's children...

I celebrate that He calls us His children even when we are
in hiding.

I celebrate love...the moments when the You is more important
than the I

I celebrate the perfect love...the cross...the Christ

loving in spite of...giving without reward

I celebrate the music within a man that must be heard

I celebrate life...that we may live more abundantly...

Where did we get the idea that balloons don't belong
in the church?

Where did we get the idea that God loves gray and Sh-h-h-h-h

And drab and anything will do?

I think it's blasphemy not to appreciate the joy in God's world.

I think it's blasphemy not to bring our joy into His church.

For God so loved the world

That He hung there

Loving the unlovable

What beautiful gift cannot be offered unto the Lord?

Whether it's a balloon or a song or some joy that sits within you
waiting to have the lid taken off.

The Scriptures say there's a time to laugh and a time to weep.

It's not hard to see the reasons for crying in a world where
man's hatred for man is so manifest.

So celebrate!

Bring your balloons and your butterflies, your bouquets of flowers...

Bring the torches and hold them high!

Dance your dances, paint your feelings, sing your songs,
whistle, laugh.

Life is a celebration, an affirmation of God's love.

Life is distributing more balloons.

For God so loved the world...

Surely that's a cause for Joy.

Surely we should celebrate!

Good News! That He should love us that much.

Where did we ever get the idea that balloons don't
belong in the church?

The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

Here is some excellent advice for each of us to remember. 


As you put these Four Agreements into practice you are bound to notice a difference in your own life as well as those around you.

"Somebody Like Me" by Jason Crabb - Don't Be a Vanilla Christian!

 
Are you a Vanilla Christian?

I heard the phrase "Vanilla Christian" on my way to work this morning.  The speaker was referring to a plain, ordinary, run of the mill "Christian" - not too different than anyone else in the whole-wide world. That phrase caught my attention as I began to process it and think it through.  

Now I am one of those gals that enjoys looking at cookbooks - yes, that is plural - cookbook"s"!!!! And, as I think back on so many of the recipes I have read, I realized that so many of the recipes call for that almost generic flavor of "vanilla".  It is so common, so basic, so almost bland.  Now, I like to change it up sometimes. I like to replace vanilla with "almond", "peppermint", "orange", or better yet . . . "cinnamon" (my all-time favorite!).  I like to add a little "splash" - a little "pizzazz" - a little "zing"!!!   Sometimes, not the ordinary but instead something a little different - a little daring - a little divine!  . . .  maybe even a little "Diana"!!!!!   LOL!!  I find this much more exciting than just plain old "vanilla".

In light of all of this . . . that phrase "Vanilla Christian" kept running through my head all day as I thought of the different recipes that called for just the basic vanilla . . . the basic Christian.  Are we "just" basic Christians or are we called to be more than so basic and plain as vanilla?  What - just what - would happen if we added a little "splash, pizzazz, a little zing" to our Vanilla Christianity?  What if our excitement caught on to our co-worker, our neighbor, our friends our family?  What if we showed God's abundant love, grace, and mercy in a "New Flavor" - in a little mint, orange, or cinnamon?  What if we exchanged the "Ordinary Vanilla Christianity" for a more distinct and bolder flavor?  A flavor that tells the world who we are and what our so called Christianity is all about.  Maybe a "Cinnamon Christianity" that speaks clearly and distinctly to those we come in contact with. Or maybe an "Orange flavored Christian" that says "orange" you glad God loves you?!  LOL!  

Why don't you put on a "new" flavor and don't just be a plain old basic "Vanilla Christian".  Make a statement - make a difference!   Pick your own "special" favorite flavor and reach out to those around you.  It could take "Somebody Just Like You" that is more than a "Vanilla Christian" to make something special happen in your own life and the lives of others.  Somebody just like you and me that will do something different - go against the grain and make a difference!

I wonder who that somebody is that could make a difference in the world around us.  Maybe that somebody is YOU!   Get rid of the Vanilla Christianity and trade the ordinary for something extra-ordinary - something different, daring, and divine!!

Listen to this song,  "Somebody Like Me" by Jason Crabb and let it challenge you to be that somebody!!

Six Ethics of Life

"I Am Who I Am"

New International Version
God said to Moses, "I AM WHO I AM". This is what you are to say to the Israelites: "I AM" has sent me to you.  -Exodus 3:14

This verse was always a bit puzzling to me.  I thought I understood who "I Am" was and what "I Am" did. But after reading the following the true meaning of "I Am" has a whole new meaning and explanation of who and what "I Am" really is, and does, and also brings to light just exactly "who I am" is.

Who is "I Am"?  Who is God?  
God is Love, Peace, Grace, Joy, Mercy, Strength, Safety, Shelter,Power, Provider, Creator, Comforter, Beginning, End, The Way,Truth, Light, Forgiveness. The list is endless!!  Stop and take a good, long, hard, look at everything that has an impact on your life. "I Am" is everywhere - all the time - constant - unchanging. "I Am" is in the little minute things in life. "I Am" is in the exciting, thrilling episodes of life. But most of all I believe "I Am" is present in the strong-holds of our lives - sustaining us - upholding us in His right hand (Isaiah 41:10) - steadying our feeble walk through this journey called life. As a parent holds up their child and looks at that child in love, awe and wonderment and whispers "you are mine" . . . so does God the great "I Am" in His still, quiet voice speak to our hearts and say . . ."YOU ARE MINE"!

The Window Through Which We Look

 

 A young couple moves into a new neighborhood

The next morning while they are eating breakfast, 

The young woman sees her neighbor hanging the wash outside.
"That laundry is not very clean", she said.
"She doesn't know how to wash correctly.
Perhaps she needs better laundry soap."
Her husband looked on, but remained silent.
Every time her neighbor would hang her wash to dry,
The young woman would make the same comments.
About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a
Nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband:
"Look, she has learned how to wash correctly.
I wonder who taught her this."

The husband said, "I got up early this morning and
Cleaned our windows..."

And so it is with life. What we see when watching others
Depends on the purity of the window through which we look.
                                                    -Unknown

Success

Everything I Need to Know About Life, I Learned From Noah's Ark

Ten Things God Can't Do

THE HISTORY OF APRONS

I don't think kids today know what an apron is...
 

The principle use of Grandma's apron was to protect 
the dress underneath because she only had a few. It 
was also because it was easier to wash aprons than 
dresses and aprons used less material. But along 
with that, it served as a potholder for removing 
hot pans from the oven.

It was wonderful for drying children's tears, and 
on occasion was even used for cleaning out dirty ears.

From the chicken coop, the apron was used for carrying 
eggs, fussy chicks, and sometimes half-hatched eggs to 
be finished in the warming oven.

When company came, those aprons were ideal hiding 
places for shy kids...

And when the weather was cold, Grandma wrapped it 
around her arms.

Those big old aprons wiped many a perspiring brow, 
bent over the hot wood stove.

Chips and kindling wood were brought into the 
kitchen in that apron.

From the garden, it carried all sorts of vegetables. 
After the peas had been shelled, it carried out the hulls.

In the fall, the apron was used to bring in apples 
that had fallen from the trees.

When unexpected company drove up the road, it was 
surprising how much furniture that old apron could 
dust in a matter of seconds.

When dinner was ready, Grandma walked out onto the 
porch, waved her apron, and the men folk knew it was 
time to come in from the fields to dinner.

It will be a long time before someone invents 
something that will replace that 'old-time apron' 
that served so many purposes.

REMEMBER...

Grandma used to set her hot baked apple pies on 
the window sill to cool. Her granddaughters set 
theirs on the window sill to thaw.

They would go crazy now trying to figure out how 
many germs were on that apron. I don't think I 
ever caught anything from an apron - but love...

[forwarded by Jerry Lambert]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is a bit of "priceless" wisdom filled to the brim 
with an out-pouring of love!

I am a MAMA!!!

The Five W's Of Life

This advice is worth taking note of and starting, if you have not already, to put into practice every day of your life!

Blessed Valentine's Day

Hope all of you out there had a Happy Valentine's Day and know what it is to be truly blessed of God!