National Zucchini Day is today, August 8th and we are getting zucchini from our garden. We got about a half of dozen the other day! They were beautiful and my head started spinning as to what I should make with these.  I started going through my stand-by recipes and then decided to search for some new possibilities!  I quickly realized that I could make a huge variety of things from these two zucchini.  I could make the traditional zucchini bread that I always make.  I could add some variety to this by adding chocolate chips or dried cranberries.  I could make my families favorite chocolate zucchini cake for all of us chocolate lovers!!  I could bread it and deep fat fry it or Air Fry it, or I could bake it or have grilled vegetable kbobs. I could stuff it, marinate it in a salad or I could make zucchini lasagna or zucchini meatloaf . . . and I could even pickle it!!!  How does one choose what to do with these two zucchini??!! Well, I settled on the zucchini bread and some breaded fried zucchini for supper. I still have a little left - just about enough to bake the chocolate zucchini cake to satisfy my sweet tooth!!  LOL!

As I was grating the zucchini I was thinking about all the different ways to use the zucchini.  It can be made into sweet things, sour things, greasy things, starchy things, breaded things, fried things, stuffed things, marinated things - you name it can be done!!  

I was thinking about how we as people are somewhat like the zucchini, believe it or not!!   We can be sweet, sour, greasy, starchy, breaded, fried, stuffed, and marinated. We too, can be all of these things! Our personalities all vary with the amount of honor, integrity, faithfulness, truthfulness, and loyalty woven into our very character. We each possess characteristics that state who we are, what we believe in and what we stand for. When I look at a zucchini - I don't automatically think of "chocolate" like a chocolate zucchini cake!! But when mixed with other important ingredients like flour, eggs, cocoa, sugar, baking soda, etc. a green vegetable called a zucchini takes on the mix of a wonderful chocolate zucchini cake!  

Just like the zucchini adds other ingredients to become a chocolate cake - we have important characteristics in our character that help us become who we are. Who are you?  What do you believe?  What do you stand for?  I hope you are adding the other important ingredients that make you stand out or stand up for who you are and what you believe is important in life.  Weave some honor, integrity, faithfulness, truthfulness, and loyalty into your character. Let God measure the exact ingredients just for "you" and let God's mix state "who you are as a child of God" and "stand tall" . . .

. . . like one of those Chocolate Zucchini cakes in one of those glass cake stands with the glass cover on them. Don't be just a zucchini - be something "special"!

Qualified or not . . .

"God doesn't chose people who are qualified. He calls people who are willing, and then He qualifies them".  - Richard Parker 

Raising Boys

I came across this article that gives us moms some good advice on what a mom should try to be to her kids.  I'm not sure who wrote this - but it is good "mom" advice for all of us moms! 

1.  A safe place to figure themselves out.
It happens almost every day, and sometimes many times a day:  Teenagers are always changing.  They will change their clothes.  Their mood.  How they walk, talk or what they’re into.  Some days they just need to figure out what feels right.  Some days nothing feels right.  Being a teenager is hard.  Sometimes our greatest job as Mom is to act like we don’t even notice.

2.  Boundaries.
Our boys need to know what is absolutely ok, and what is absolutely not.  They may resist rules, but deep down they feel safe when there are clear cut rules without exceptions.  Make them clear and consistent, and have absolute consequences in place for when they break rules.  Boundaries = Security. 

3.  Freedom.
Within those boundaries, teenage boys need the opportunity to stretch their wings.  Teenage boys should be encouraged…Even pushed–to try new things, to take some risks, to find adventure.  Given enough opportunities for healthy adventure, they will avoid a lot of trouble.  (Remember–”Idle hands” and all of that…)
Keep boys busy doing character building, exciting activities and watch them become men before your eyes.
Side note: **My personal Mom-motto has always been “With Freedom comes responsibility.”  The minute my boys act in irresponsibly, they will lose freedom.  So the freedoms we give are taken very seriously.  

4.  A Listening Ear.Boys need to talk.  Even the quietest ones will open up when given the chance.  Get them alone, in the car or wherever you can, and make it clear that you WANT to hear about their interests, and their lives.  Be patient, and try different times and places until you figure it out.  I push through the ‘awkward,’ and bring up subjects that make my boys squirm (hello puberty!) but no one has died yet.  This makes it clear that I am OK with any and every topic and I will always be available and comfortable talking.
**When asked what he most needs from me, this was the first thing my oldest son named.  A Mom that can listen and not criticize or manipulate is a really valuable thing. (call me a work in progress here.)

5.  A Sense of Humor.
This is the good stuff.  Teenagers…are hilarious.  This may be my very favorite thing about these years.  No more knock-knock jokes or bad made-up jokes that never seem to come to a conclusion.  Teenagers actually GET STUFF.   There’s hardly anything like the bond of a good laugh with my boys.

When one of my boys come out laughing and want me to watch a funny Vine or Youtube Video, I drop everything for it.
Side note #1: As for us–**We have a rule of “clean” entertainment only.  No swearing or off color anything.  And they know that if I find them following anyone inappropriate, I’ll remove their Vine/YouTube etc account(See #2))
Side note #2**I have a “I can check your phone, computer, etc anytime I want to–no questions asked.”  This keeps everyone in check.

There is plenty of FUN and FUNNY entertainment out there if you look for it.
it’s a hard world:  A good sense of humor will get your kid through many trials in life–So encourage it.

6.  Touch.
Your teenage son will likely pull away from you physically, and that is normal, albeit painful.  But even the most rigid, sulky teenage boy needs hugs from Mom.  Don’t get awkward and keep a distance.  Create a “hug a day” rule or something that makes it routine and normal.  He’ll love it even if he refuses to show it.

7.  Genuine interest.
What does your teenager love?  Learn to love it too.  Know at least enough about what they are passionate about so that you can have a decent conversation.   This will keep doors open greater than any other gesture you can make.

8.  Forgiveness.
Teenagers will make mistakes.  Lots of them.  They’ll act selfish.  They’ll space out.  They’ll get insecure and do stupid things because of it.  They are going to mess up so much you’ll wonder where you went wrong.  If you know it’s coming, it won’t throw you off.  Consequences may be in order, but so is a whole lot of grace.

9.  Direction.
Listen Mom:  Your teenager actually WANTS you to give them guidance.  Sure, they’ll act like they don’t, but they do.  Keep it relevant, and as brief as possible, but when you see them facing forks in the road, go ahead and speak some good solid words of advice to them.  Share a Bible Verse that fits their situation.  Quote someone they might respect.  You are their greatest resource they have, and they need your direction.  They’ll thank you, even if it takes twenty years.

10.  Encouragement.
It’s hard to be a teenager.  (remember?)  The world will yell and scream all kinds of negatives to your son.  So be his greatest fan.  Be his cheerleader.  Believe in him with your heart, and tell him that you do.  Every.  Single.  Day.  I’m not talking about phony, contrived encouragement (Everyone is a winner!) but the authentic kind that finds their greatest gifting's, and speaks them boldly.

11.  An example.
Our kids are watching us.  They get a lot more of an idea about what is right, wrong, good and bad from what you do than what you say.  So take your position seriously.  No, you’ll never be perfect, and you can tell your kid that–but don’t use that fact as an excuse to be lame.  If you don’t want them to swear, don’t swear.  If you teach them to speak well of others, make sure you do the same.  Probably the greatest thing you can do for your son is to model the kind of person you want them to be.

A common key to pretty much everything I have named is that Mom is involved in the teen’s life.  To listen, or discipline..to share a joke, or a hug…you need to be in close proximity to your kids.  For those moms that work long hours or cannot be physically involved in your children’s lives, I encourage you to creatively find solutions for this.  You will never regret making sacrifices or adjustments so that you can be present for your children when they need you.   And the thing with parenting is–you’re never really sure when they’ll need you.  So being there as much as possible is key.  Do what you are able, rely on others to help when you’re not able, and put your job as parent before anything that you possibly can. 

Finally:  If you’re like me, you’ll love parenting your teenage son.  However at times it can feel like a crazy balancing act…Do they need more grace?  More rules?  Do they need space, or hugs, or advice, or WHAT!!!???  It’s ok.  Pray a lot.  Keep communication open and let your kid know that Frankly You don’t know what they need…But you want to be there for them.  If you have invested in the early years, then the doors will be open and they will trust and respect you as teenagers too.

God Understands Our Prayers Even When We Can't Find the Words to Say Them . . .

~ ~ ~ BLESSED ASSURANCE ~ ~ ~

Have you ever been to that point in your life where you realized that . . . God understands your prayers . . . even when you can't find the words to say them.

I have literally "been" there - right at that very point in my life.  In my own feeble and frail circumstances, I was there.  My simple prayers and utterings were not only heard by my God but God understood every one of my prayers - even when I could not find the words to say them!! Yes, I believe He heard them and understood every one of them knowing far more than I myself knew. I didn't realize that I had two brain tumors each one the size of a tangerine! I had know idea that they were pressing on my brain gradually limiting my speech, communication, and even my thought processes.  It was so gradual, that I didn't realize until I went to the doctor and was told to check into the hospital by 7:00 pm that very same evening.  But I believe my God knew ALL about me and my circumstances that very day.  I had NO WORDS to say or to pray at that particular day - I couldn't find any words to say.  But God knew the "prayer of my heart" even when I could not express it.  He knows and He truly does understand. I thank God for that "Blessed Assurance" we can have in Christ.  

He will Cover You with His Feathers!

Psalm 91:4 - "He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection".

This picture captures it all, doesn't it?   Here - a mother bird - but in life among the living - our hope is in God who "covers" us with his feathers!  His feathers of protection, love, care, togetherness, shelter, companionship, trust, hope, nurture, need, mercy, meaning etc. God can and will be our "all" in "all" if we put our trust and faith in His promises. Promises to lead and direct our daily routines . . . every day; to protect and care for our every need . . . every day; to cover us with His feathers - his blessings, his grace, his mercy as we trust "Him" to provide out of the abundance of His ultimate love. 

Advice from an Old Farmer

Shared photo by Ty Brown
The following is a bit of advice that would do us all good to read and take to heart.  Some's a bit humorous, some's just common sense - but all is worth taking time to read it for what it's worth!!

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.
Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.
Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere
     tractor.
Words that soak into your ears are whispered… not yelled.
Meanness don’t jes’ happen overnight.
Forgive your enemies; it messes up their heads.
Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
It don’t take a very big person to carry a grudge.
You cannot unsay a cruel word.
Every path has a few puddles.
When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
The best sermons are lived, not preached.
Most of the stuff people worry about ain’t never gonna
     happen anyway.
Don’t judge folks by their relatives.
Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
Live a good, honorable life… Then when you get older and
     think back, you’ll enjoy it a second time.
Don ‘t interfere with somethin’ that ain’t bothering you
     none.
Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a Rain dance.
If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop
     diggin’.
Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
The biggest troublemaker you’ll probably ever have to deal
     with, watches you from the mirror every mornin’.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that
     comes from bad judgment.
Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin’
     it back in.
If you get to thinkin’ you’re a person of some influence, try
     orderin’ somebody else’s dog around.
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
Don’t pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight,
     he’ll just kill you.
Most times, it just gets down to common sense.

The Professional Prayer Answerer!

Here's a little story that reminds us of the power of prayer!!

She hurried to the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys inside.

The woman found an old rusty coat hanger left on the ground. She looked at it and said, "I don't know how to use this."

She bowed her head and asked God to send her some HELP.  Within 5 minutes a beat-up old motorcycle pulled up, driven by a gruff bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag. He got off of his cycle and asked if he could help.

She said: "Yes, my daughter is sick.  I’ve locked my keys in my car.  I must get home. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?"

He said, "Sure."  He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car was open.

She hugged the man and through tears said, "Thank You God for sending me such a very nice man."

The man heard her little prayer and replied, "Lady, I am NOT a nice man. I just got out of PRISON yesterday; I was in prison for car theft."

The woman hugged the man again sobbing, "Oh, thank you, God! You even sent me a Professional!"        Is GOD great or what?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Matthew 6:8 says, ". . . your Father knows what you need before you ask Him".  

Isn't it awesome - God KNOWS our needs before we even ASK!!!   It continues to amaze me that God not only "knows" - He "knows" what is "best", what is "available", even "how" things will come to pass - God knows our needs and He knows how He is going to answer our prayers in advance of our human utterances.  And the best part . . . just as the lady in the story said, "God even sent a 'professional' to answer her pray"!!!  You can't beat that, can you?! 

Take a few minutes and stop to reflect on the answers to some of your prayers.  It's easy to set those answers aside and as the days, weeks, and months go by we sometimes put them out-of-sight / out-of-mind!  But let's stake stock and "remember" how blessed we really are - both in the little answers and, of course, in the big answers to our prayers.

P.S.  Don't forget to thank God when he answers our prayers!!  

Red Marbles Story by Devonay Potter

  Red Marbles! . . .

I was at the corner grocery store buying some early potatoes. I noticed a small boy, delicate of bone and feature, ragged but clean, hungrily appraising a basket of freshly picked green peas.

I paid for my potatoes but was also drawn to the display of fresh green peas. I am a pushover for creamed peas and new potatoes.

Pondering the peas, I couldn't help overhearing the conversation between Mr.. Miller (the store owner) and the ragged boy next to me.

'Hello Barry, how are you today?'
'H'lo, Mr. Miller. Fine, thank ya. Jus' admirin' them peas. They sure look good..'
'They are good, Barry.. How's your Ma?'

'Fine. Gittin' stronger alla' time.'
'Good. Anything I can help you with?'

'No, Sir.
Jus' admirin' them peas.'
'Would you like to take some home?' asked Mr. Miller.

'No, Sir. Got nuthin' to pay for 'em with.'
'Well, what have you to trade me for some of those peas?'
'All I got's my prize marble here.'

'Is that right? Let me see it' said Miller.

'Here 'tis. She's a dandy.'
'I can see that. Hmm mmm, only thing is this one is blue and I sort of go for red. Do you have a red one like this at home?' the store owner asked..
'Not zackley but almost.'
'Tell you what. Take this sack of peas home with you and next trip this way let me look at that red marble'. Mr. Miller told the boy.
'Sure will. Thanks Mr. Miller.'

Mrs... Miller, who had been standing nearby, came over to help me.
With a smile she said, 'There are two other boys like him in our community, all three are in very poor circumstances.. Jim just loves to bargain with them for peas, apples, tomatoes, or whatever..

When they come back with their red marbles, and they always do, he decides he doesn't like red after all and he sends them home with a bag of produce for a green marble or an orange one, when they come on their next trip to the store.'

I left the store smiling to myself, impressed with this man. A short time later I moved to Colorado , but I never forgot the story of this man, the boys, and their bartering for marbles.

Several years went by, each more rapid than the previous one. Just recently I had occasion to visit some old friends in that Idaho community and while I was there learned that Mr. Miller had died. They were having his visitation that evening and knowing my friends wanted to go, I agreed to accompany them. Upon arrival at the mortuary we fell into line to meet the relatives of the deceased and to offer whatever words of comfort we could.

Ahead of us in line were three young men. One was in an army uniform and the other two wore nice haircuts, dark suits and white shirts...all very professional looking. They approached Mrs. Miller, standing composed and smiling by her husband's casket.

Each of the young men hugged her, kissed her on the cheek, spoke briefly with her and moved on to the casket. Her misty light blue eyes followed them as, one by one, each young man stopped briefly and placed his own warm hand over the cold pale hand in the casket. Each left the mortuary awkwardly, wiping his eyes...

Our turn came to meet Mrs. Miller. I told her who I was and reminded her of the story from those many years ago and what she had told me about her husband's bartering for marbles. With her eyes glistening, she took my hand and led me to the casket.

'Those three young men who just left were the boys I told you about.
They just told me how they appreciated the things Jim 'traded' them. Now, at last, when Jim could not change his mind about color or size.....they came to pay their debt.'

'We've never had a great deal of the wealth of this world,' she confided, 'but right now, Jim would consider himself the richest man in Idaho ..'

With loving gentleness she lifted the lifeless fingers of her deceased husband. Resting underneath were three exquisitely shined red marbles.

The Moral :
We will not be remembered by our words, but by our kind deeds. Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath.

Today I wish you a day of ordinary miracles:

A fresh pot of coffee you didn't make yourself...
An unexpected phone call from an old friend .....
Green stoplights on your way to work...
The fastest line at the grocery store...
A good sing-along song on the radio...
Your keys found right where you left them.

Share this with the people you'll never forget.  I just Did...

IT'S NOT WHAT YOU GATHER, BUT WHAT YOU SCATTER THAT TELLS WHAT KIND OF LIFE YOU HAVE LIVED

                                                                                         -  Devonay Potter

I too will think of this little story of the marbles, bartering and miracles in the days ahead!

Difference between a Hymn and a Praise Chorus!!!

Being the "farm-girl" that I am and also being born and raised on music, this funny little story sure got the point across!!  And the fact that I grew up on Hymns and watched the emerging of choruses in the church-world made this quite humorous . . . Martha, Martha, cows, cows, corn, corn and more corn!!!  LOL!

 A Funny Little Story About Hymns and Praise Songs  By Author Unknown

An old farmer went to the city one weekend and attended the big city church. He came home and his wife asked him how it as.“Well,” said the farmer. “It was good. They did something different, however. They sang praise choruses instead of hymns.” “Praise choruses?” asked the wife. “What are those?” “Oh, they’re okay. They’re sort of like hymns, only different,” said the farmer.  “Well, what’s the difference?” asked the wife.

The farmer said, “Well it’s like this …
If I were to say to you, ‘Martha, the cows are in the corn,’ well that would be a hymn. If, on the other hand, I were to say to you, ‘Martha, Martha, Martha, Oh, Martha, MARTHA, MARTHA, the cows, the big cows, the brown cows, the black cows, the white cows, the black and white cows, the COWS, COWS, COWS are in the corn, are in the corn, are in the corn, in the CORN, CORN, CORN, COOOOORRRRRNNNNN,’ then, if I were to repeat the whole thing two or three times, well that would be a praise chorus.”

As luck would have it, the exact same Sunday a young, new Christian from the city church attended the small town church. He came home and his wife asked him how it was. “Well,” said the young man, “It was good. They did something different, however. They sang hymns instead of regular songs.” “Hymns?” asked the wife. “What are those?”  “They’re okay. They’re sort of like regular songs, only different,” said the young man. “Well, what’s the difference?” asked the wife.

The young man said, “Well it’s like this … 
If I were to say to you, ‘Martha, the cows are in the corn, well that would be a regular song. If on the other hand, I were to say to you, Oh Martha, dear Martha, hear thou my cry inclinest thine ear to the words of my mouth.

Turn thou thy whole wondrous ear by and by to the righteous, glorious truth. For the way of the animals who can explain there in their heads is no shadow of sense, hearkenest they in God’s sun or his rain unless from the mild, tempting corn they are fenced. 

Yea, those cows in glad bovine, rebellious delight, 

have broke free their shackles, their warm pens eschewed.

Then goaded by minions of darkness and night they all my mild Chilliwack sweet corn chewed. So look to that bright shining day by and by, where all foul corruptions of earth are reborn where no vicious animal makes my soul cry and I no longer see those foul cows in the corn . . .  

Then, if I were to do only verses one, three and four, and change keys on the last verse, well THAT WOULD BE A HYMN!”

http://www.apuritansmind.com/

David Phelps - The End of The Begining

As I celebrate this Easter, this song has been running through my head this entire week. 

What a message it tells - the "end" of the "beginning".  What an impact it can and will make in our lives - if we will really listen and look at the words.  It really does tell it all!!  It sums up the Jesus that was born as a babe, lived, walked on the water, healed the sick, raised the dead, and the ultimate sacrifice of "His Own Life" only to be raised from the dead on what we call Easter . . . the end of the beginning!  

This is a powerful song! I encourage you to enjoy, listen, look and live out the "end of the beginning" in your life this Easter season and all of the days ahead.  

Have a "BLESSED EASTER"!

Gracious Words

Years ago growing up on the farm, one of my fondest memories was the year we robbed the "honeycomb" out of the big tree down in the pasture!!  I will never forget that moment.  My Aunt Jinny and Uncle Howard were out visiting. They came out to the farm almost "weekly" and Aunt Jinny was "game" for almost anything.  She is the same aunt that we made divinity in every color of the rainbow - now just the traditional pink, white or green - every color . . . just to see if it tasted any different!!  LOL!

My brother came up to the house from checking on the cows in the pasture and said, "there's a big "honeycomb" in a tree down in the pasture"!  That is all it took for Aunt Jinny to perk up and say, "let's go rob it"!!!   And so we all - the whole family - tracked down the well-worn cow path up and down and around and over until we saw the bees swarming around the tree.  It brought back memories of Pooh Bear!!!  LOL!

We all kept our distance watching as Aunt Ginny and my brother, John, slowly approached the bee hive.  Moving slowly, so as to not upset the bees, they got the honeycomb down out of the tree, put it in a 5 gallon bucket, and managed to get only a sting or two. Leaving the confused, angry, buzzing bees behind, we trailed single file back up the old cow path to the barn and on to the house.

Aunt Jinny knew just what to do with the honey.  I remember it was the clearest, most tasty honey I had ever experienced. We decided that fresh, clear honey needed to top off some pancakes.  So mom was busy making hot pancakes and Aunt Jinny was taking care of getting the honey out of the comb and we kids anxiously awaited our feast of hot pancakes with fresh honey on them.  Mmmmmm . . . was that ever good!

I will NEVER forget that afternoon of robbing the honeycomb out of the tree in the pasture and pancakes dripping with the "best honey" I have ever eaten!!  

Just as that honey was the sweetest honey I have ever tasted - straight from the honeycomb - I realize how important our words are.  They too need to be pleasant, sweet, healing, uplifting, and encouraging.  Our words can have a positive influence on the world around us.  Let's strive to make our words . . . sweet to the soul and healing to the bones . . . just like that honey dripping from the honeycomb!

"Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones."  Probverbs 16:24

Eight Qualities of a Successful Life

Qualities of Success

We all want to be successful deep down in our "heart of hearts" - but how do we accomplish this task?  Here are some things Suze Orman has observed as she talks to people.  She states 
. . .  It's about making the most of the life you have.  And that comes down to embracing the eight qualities that allow you to take control of your destiny. 

• Harmony is when there is complete agreement between what you think, say and do.
  
• Balance is the reward of harmony; it is when you are most calm and content because there is no disconnect between your thoughts, words and actions.
  
• Courage. Is the ability to make choices that bring harmony and balance. Courage is not always about action. It takes courage to do nothing, rather than do something that you do not believe in or understand.
  
• Generosity. True generosity is an offering; given freely and out of pure love. No strings attached. No expectations. Time and love are the most valuable possession you can share.
  
• Happiness: bubbles up when the first four qualities are in abundance. Happiness is not a luxury. It is a necessity. When we are happy we are in the best possible place to be good to ourselves and those we love.
  
• Wisdom: is the ability to make the right decisions at the right time. Wisdom alerts you when you are out of balance or having trouble summoning courage. It is your inner voice guiding you through and past the noise.
  
• Cleanliness: When there is clarity and organization in your thoughts and your physical space you can more easily access the inner wisdom and courage that makes harmony and balance achievable.
  
• Beauty is what you possess when you incorporate the seven preceding qualities into your life.

Suse shares some pretty basic qualities:  harmony, balance, courage, generosity, happiness, wisdom, cleanliness, and beauty. But look at how they impact each of our lives as we follow God's leading and direction.  These qualities plus God equals AWESOME!!!! 

My Faith Journey (Dec. 7, 2012-Dec. 7, 2014)

https://myspace.com/themoweryfour/music/song/we-ve-come-this-far-by-faith-11048507-10849691?play=1

Little did I know some 39 years ago that the title song to our record album - (I've Come This Far By Faith) would become my "theme song" for these past two years!!  2013/14 has truly been a "faith-journey" for me. I am a little slow in getting all of my thoughts, feelings, and actions together for this little December 2014 blog - it is really hard to put "everything" I have experienced and felt over the last two years into words!! But I will try . . .
A MRI on December 7, 2012, revealed a "large, fast-growing, malignant tumor embedding in my brain" resulting in immediate admittance into the hospital and surgery scheduled.  Looking back, it kind of remindes me of the phrase in Monopoly   . . . "go directly to hospital from the doctor's office - do not pass go - do not collect $200"!!   I need not say that my whole world changed! My whole "outlook" on life, laughter, love, and legacy took on a different point of view! Things that were so important to me before discovering I had the brain tumors seemed somewhat insignificant since then and other things gained much more attention and significance!!  Isn't it strange how we get so wrapped up in "living" until we face something like this and have to turn "everything" . . . life, living, hopes, plans, dreams, yes EVERYTHING over to God and place our total being by faith in HIS HANDS and trust that He knows our future and what is ahead?!
For me, it was surgery on December 12, 2012 (12-12-12 - easy to remember, huh?), surgery, recovery, recuperation, and 5 1/2 months of intense speech therapy, new beginnings, first times once again - tackling things I had done before, without a thought, but now had to overcome those 1st's times. Every day, week, month, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months, and finally each year - were stepping stones in my recovery! Yes, there were times I had my set-backs but my "forward steps" led me down "new paths" nearly "daily".  When I think back two years ago - I was recuperating at my parents house - I went there when released from the hospital just in time for Christmas.  I was not working during my recover time but was going to speech therapy 3 times a week, learning 1,000's upon 1,000's of words, synonyms, antonyms, opposites, etc. I felt like I was back in school. All of that seems almost like yesterday!

I came out of surgery with some "communicative aphasia" because the tumors affected the communicative part of my brain.  I knew what I was trying to say and many times the "word" was right on the tip of my tongue but I just could not express the word.  Thus, the reason for my re-learning synonyms, antonyms, opposites, etc.  When I would not be able to speak and get the word I wanted out, I would have to train myself to quickly think of another word that had the same meaning that I was trying to express to take the place of the "blocked word".  It was a very interesting time and a time of renewal for me. I am now somewhat intrigued with "words", meanings, etc.  It took me a while before I felt capable to communicate with people. In the beginning I said things that really were not exactly what I meant.  A good example was when my cousin came to see me and he was saying "good-bye" - I knew I needed to acknowledge his "good-bye" and I knew there was an appropriate phrase for me to respond with - so I said . . . "congratulations"!!  My speech therapist was so good about explaining how intricate God made our brains, how they work and shared that my brain was searching for greeting/good-bye type phrases to use. And congratulations fits in that greeting/good-bye category!  That made me feel better as to why I responded with that particular word - but I know my cousin probably thought it a little strange!!!  LOL!!  It seemed that the minute I would say a strange word or phase like that, I would realize . . . NOT the right word!!   Actually, many times it was quite funny and we all had a good laugh over some of my speech ventures. But it seemed to get better every week!  Of which I am so thankful for. I now only experience a little of the the aphasia - especially when I am tired!!  God was with me every step of the way - miracle after miracle!!  I came home from the hospital right before Christmas so I call this "My Christmas Miracle" and the journey that has followed these past two years has been a journey filled with many, many miracles, blessings, much thankfulness and many thoughts and feelings that I cannot begin to express in just a few word.  My "faith" was stretched beyond what I thought it could be stretched and I can once again sing our theme song "I've Come This Far By Faith" leaning on the Lord!!  And I'm guessing today I sing that song with much more understanding and a whole lot more meaning than what I sang it 39 years ago!!  

(The days following my surgery were long days for my family and myself, as you can see from this little video, as I tried to communicate my thoughts and my family tried to decipher what I was trying to tell them!  It is a reminder of where I have been and how far I have come with the help of God!)  A GREAT BIG THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU!!!
As I look back to where I started since the removal of the tumors I am amazed. And I can honestly say I have only minimal recollection of the months leading up to the first MRI and the discovery of the tumors.  I was in "survivor mode" only remembering what was absolutely necessary to get me by, from day to day. Everything "non-essential" is a blur or I can hardly recollect it. The doctor later explained how totally unique the brain is. It knows just what we need to survive. Because of the size the two tumors (each one the size of a tangerine), they were pressing against my brain squeezing and putting pressure on it as they grew, causing me to only remember the important things I needed to remember to survive each day.  The rest, I either did not remember at all or remember only faintly and many things are very vague. In other words, my brain was operating in "survival mode".

My last week to work before the surgery I only remember calling in sick to work on Wednesday. I didn't feel good. I couldn't tell you what was wrong - just did not feel right - not myself!  I had left a message on the answering machine but the pastor had trouble making it out. What I thought I said was, "Pastor, I am not feeling well.  I won't be coming in to work today. I will see you tomorrow!" What he heard was something slurred like . . . "IIIII  waaanntt toooo leaaave aaa messssssaaageeee"!!!!  A little alarmed, he came to my house to check on me. He immediately talked to one of my daughters who then stopped by on her lunch hour for a while and then both daughters stopped by the house as soon as they got off work. They set a doctors appointment for me the next morning, Thursday. My younger daughter took me to work and she later told me she was afraid to leave me alone but I insisted on going to work before the doctor's appointment.  She left and decided to stop and get us both  cappuccino, brought it back, and sat in the office with me until it was time for the appointment. 

It is totally "mind-boggling" to hear them share now, what they saw in me during those days - those weeks and months - preceding the surgery.  We went to the doctor that afternoon and he scheduled a MRI for the next day, Friday at 1:00 pm.  We all went to work and then the girls picked me up and we went to get the MRI and then we were all going to go back work.  But they sent us back to my regular doctor following the MRI and we waited in his office until he had no more patients.  He then came in and began to explain the MRI.  My girls started crying. They told me I just sat emotionless and very calmly asked, "how long do I have?" I was to go to the hospital and be admitted by 7:00 pm that same evening after the doctor's appointment.  

None of us had eaten lunch so Liz and I were going to make the necessary phone calls to break the news to family and Hannah was going home to get Noah and we were going to meet at Burger King and get a bite to eat and discuss the situation between the four of us.  I told Liz I should call mom so she dialed and I told mom and I just remember handing the phone to Liz after I told mom and she talked to mom for a little bit.  Liz tells me that I then called my brothers, John and Dennis - but I do not remember talking to either of them at all.  I do remember telling Liz as we headed for Burger King (5:30 pm) that I had to go back to work.  I had to finish the bulletin for Sunday. She got upset with me and told me in a FIRM voice that, "I wasn't going back to work I was going to the hospital and that was it"!!!!!  What I must have put my three children, my family, and my friends through during these months, must have been unimaginable!!  (Maybe it is better that I don't remember!!)

These two years have been an "unforgettable journey" for me and my family. We have crossed many bridges I never thought possible.  But I am reminded of Moses leading the Israelites . . . not "across" the Red Sea . . . but "thru" the Red Sea! I imagine they thought THAT was impossible also. But I have learned that with God, nothing is really impossible!  My hope, trust, and faith have grown since the tumors were discovered. I have had to lean on those close to me for support and encouragement but I have learned "anew" to put my hand in the "Hand of God" and let "Him" support and hold me up even when I could not get up by myself!! Knowing, when I couldn't even pray for myself . . . He was interceding on my behalf!  What an awesome experience that is! What an "awesome God" we serve!

I look back at the obstacles I have crossed these past couple of years in so many different areas of my life and I can truly say, "I've Come This Far By Faith". I am NOT the same person I was before. I have a new "lease on life!" I have a heart overflowing with a "new" sense of peace, love, and joy unspeakable!  Life is so very, very good!

(My faith-journey song) . . .

I've come this far by faith,
leaning on the Lord;
trusting in his holy word.
He's never failed me yet.
Oh! I can't turn back,
I've come this far by faith.

1) Don't be discouraged 
with trouble in your life;
he'll bear your burdens 
and move all discord and strife. Oh!

2) Just remember the good things he has done;
things that seemed impossible,
oh, praise him for the vict'ries he has won. Oh!
So, like that second verse . . . "I'm remembering the good things He has done - things that seemed impossible and praising him for the victories won!" 

I recently went to a Jeff and Sheri Easter Concert and Sheri (a cancer survivor herself) wrote a song that spoke to my heart. It touched me and the title says it all . . . "I Know How it Feels to Survive".

I've been afraid / Been confused  /  Doubted everything I thought that I knew / But I've felt peace / And I've been loved / Got back on my feet, thanking God above.

CHORUS: And I know how it feels to walk out of a valley / And how it feels to breathe the air that gives me life / I know the silence that comes with trusting and believing / And the darkness when the shadows hide the light / Yeah, I know how it feels to survive.

I've been alone / Felt betrayed / Didn't know if I could stand another day / But I found joy / And I've had faith / I've known the strength that gets me through one more day.

Now I live with eyes wide open / And my heart is filled with gratitude / I know everything I have is only borrowed / And by the grace of God I know I'll make it through.
. . . I'd like to think that these past two years have taught me to live with "my eyes wide open", with a heart filled up and overflowing with faith,  gratitude, and love knowing that everyday is a borrowed blessing. And that, by the grace and mercy of my all-knowing,  all-faithful God . . . I will make it through - come what may!

Thank you, God, for this little "bump" in the road along my "faith-journey"!

Would it Matter?

Would it Matter? Posted: 12 Nov 2014 05:43 PM PST To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived, this is to have succeeded. – Ralph Waldo Emerson If you have ever doubted yourself or believed you aren’t enough, this is for you. If you have ever lost hope, this is for you. If you have ever thought you couldn’t last one day longer, this is for you. If you have ever prayed this prayer, this is for you. The prayer What if I didn’t wake tomorrow, would anybody miss me? What if I kept my words to myself, would anybody care? Would it matter if I wasn’t here? Sometimes the world feels so large and I feel so small. The dreams that once kept me awake now haunt me because some may never come true. Why does it seem like everyone is better than me? Why does it seem like I will never get it right? What if I didn’t wake tomorrow, would anybody miss me? Would it matter? The answer Yes, it would matter. Everything you do has a ripple effect that touches the people around you. Even in your darkest hour, your presence has the ability to offer hope. It could be the smile you offer or an act of kindness you do, but understand this – you matter. You matter because you’ve been given gifts no one else has. You matter because you were created with God’s love. You matter because you were made to remind others how to be strong, be faithful and never give up. So, don’t you give up now. Because you matter. by Alex Blackwell www.The BridgeMaker.com

The Last Time

As time goes by, I look back on the many, many "last times" I have experienced.  Far too many to even put into words - some even forgotten!  Not on purpose but buried deep in my heart and mind waiting for something to jar that "last time" memory to the surface and make me smile.  The events of life may be "last time" events but we can cherish the memory of each of those "last time" memories . . . oh, the sweet fragrance of those memories!

Balloons Belong in Church ~ by Ann Weems

Here's an interesting read . . .

I took to church one morning a happy four-year-old boy

Holding a bright blue string to which was attached 

his much loved orange balloon with pink stripes...

Certainly a thing of beauty

And if not forever, at least a joy for a very important now.

When later he met me at the door

Clutching blue string, orange and pink bobbing behind him,

He didn't have to tell me something had gone wrong.

"What's the matter?" He wouldn't tell me.

"I bet they loved your balloon..."

Out it came, then -- mocking the teacher's voice, "We don't bring
balloons to church."

Then that little four-year old, his lip a little trembly, asked:

"Why aren't balloons allowed in church? I thought God would
like balloons."

I celebrate balloons, parades and chocolate chip cookies.

I celebrate seashells and elephants and lions that roar.

I celebrate roasted marshmallows and chocolate cake and fresh fish.

I celebrate aromas: bread baking, mincemeat, lemons...

I celebrate seeing: bright colors, wheat in a field, tiny wild flowers...

I celebrate hearing: waves pounding, the rain's rhythm, soft voices...

I celebrate touching: toes in the sand, a kitten's soft fur,
another person...

I celebrate the sun that shines slab dab in our faces...

I celebrate the crashing thunder and the brazen lightning...

And I celebrate the green of the world...the life-giving green...the
hope-giving green...

I celebrate birth: the wonder...the miracle...of that tiny life
already asserting its self-hood.

I celebrate children

who laugh out loud

who walk in the mud and dawdle in the puddles

who put chocolate fingers anywhere

who like to be tickled

who scribble in church

who whisperin loud voices

who sing in louder voices

who run...and laugh when they fall

who cry at the top of their lungs

who cover themselves with bandaids

who squeeze the toothpaste all over the bathroom

who slurp their soup

who chew coughdrops

who ask questions

who give us sticky, paste-covered creations

who want their picture taken

who won't use their napkins

who bury goldfish, sleep with the dog, scream at their
best friend

who hug us in a hurry and rush outside without their hats.

I celebrate children

who are so busy living they don't have time for our hangups

And I celebrate adults who are as little children.

I celebrate the man who breaks up the meaningless routines
of his life.

The man who stops to reflect, to question, to doubt.

-- The man who isn't afraid to feel....

The man who refuses to play the game.

I celebrate anger at injustice

I celebrate tears for the mistreated, the hurt, the lonely...

I celebrate the community that cares... the church...

I celebrate the church.

I celebrate the times when we in the church made it...

When we answered a cry

When we held to our warm and well-fed bodies a lonely world.

I celebrate the times when we let God get through to our
hiding places

Through our maze of meetings

Our pleasant facade...deep down to our selfhood

Deep down to where we really are.

Call it heart, soul, naked self

It's where we hide

Deep down away from God

And away from each other.

I celebrate the times when the church is the Church

When we are Christians

When we are living, loving, contributing God's children...

I celebrate that He calls us His children even when we are
in hiding.

I celebrate love...the moments when the You is more important
than the I

I celebrate the perfect love...the cross...the Christ

loving in spite of...giving without reward

I celebrate the music within a man that must be heard

I celebrate life...that we may live more abundantly...

Where did we get the idea that balloons don't belong
in the church?

Where did we get the idea that God loves gray and Sh-h-h-h-h

And drab and anything will do?

I think it's blasphemy not to appreciate the joy in God's world.

I think it's blasphemy not to bring our joy into His church.

For God so loved the world

That He hung there

Loving the unlovable

What beautiful gift cannot be offered unto the Lord?

Whether it's a balloon or a song or some joy that sits within you
waiting to have the lid taken off.

The Scriptures say there's a time to laugh and a time to weep.

It's not hard to see the reasons for crying in a world where
man's hatred for man is so manifest.

So celebrate!

Bring your balloons and your butterflies, your bouquets of flowers...

Bring the torches and hold them high!

Dance your dances, paint your feelings, sing your songs,
whistle, laugh.

Life is a celebration, an affirmation of God's love.

Life is distributing more balloons.

For God so loved the world...

Surely that's a cause for Joy.

Surely we should celebrate!

Good News! That He should love us that much.

Where did we ever get the idea that balloons don't
belong in the church?